Updated: Oct 20, 2020
I met Kristin in December 2018 when she came in to do her Boudoir Session. She was eager and strong, giving off the "Amy Winehouse" look in every image. Her catchphrase throughout the session was
"I am obsessed" and let's be honest, we still are.
I never forgot her energy, she was a client that really held a special place in my heart. She opened up about her recent mental health issues and we talked about everything in a safe and judgment-free studio. We went over traumas, toxic relationships, self-harm, and how to heal from your past. She will forever be someone that will remind me of strength and humanity.
She came back to the studio in 2019 wanting to do another Boudoir Session...This time it was different. She has a different energy than before. She stated she wanted to do a session including her scars, and expressed the need to show them to the world. I fell right back in love with her again. The way she described her scars was not about pain, but about what she has accomplished by not giving up. As if those marks on her wrist were her reminder to keep going.
So, I present to you... Her Story.
"I have always struggled with my lack of self-confidence. I constantly saw myself as the fat friend, the ugly friend, the outcast. And for whatever reason, I always let men determine my worth. Depression runs high in both sides of my family, and in high school, I struggled with self-harm. Taking the blade to my wrist, everything in my head went silent, just for those few minutes. "
"After high school, I only had one incident, and it was also after a nasty breakup, where my best friend slept with my boyfriend. I went back to the razor. I felt utterly betrayed by the two people I loved the most, and it ate me alive. "
"After that, I moved back in with my parents and got on the right track again. I didn’t cut for 5 years."
Recently, I went through an extremely traumatic breakup.
He left without any explanation, and I let it destroy me. I ended up in the ER, and he didn’t even check on me. The man who said he loved me every day, completely abandoned me. I was lost, hopeless, and miserable. I truly didn’t think I would come back.."
"But I did. And I came back stronger, I came back with a vengeance. "
"Through all the shit life has thrown at me, I survived."
"After all the men that treated me like trash, I survived."
"After the years of self hatred and abuse, I survived. "
"For a while, I was so embarrassed about my scars. I saw them as a weakness; I saw myself as broken. But I am not broken, and I’m no longer ashamed of my scars. I have been through hell and lived to talk about it. I am a strong, intelligent, beautiful, kind, loving, honest, hard working woman, and NO ONE will EVER take that from me again."
Everyday we are given the choice to pick ourselves back up. I hope that you choose to pick yourself up.
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